Tag Archives: publishing

So much pressure

5 Apr

This week the editorial staff at work is conducting interviews for the summer internship. More times than not, the interviewees arrive plenty early and have to wait in the lobby (what good little go-getters) giving me time to chat them up. This afternoon a bright-eyed, curly red-head came in and announced she was here for her interview, with an enthusiasm I knew too well. We got to talking and she told me she was a freshman at USC, she grew up in the Valley, and went to Harvard Westlake (a very high-end private school that only accepts extreme success, not unsimilar to my own high school). Her first question to me was “Did you always want to be a lifestyle journalist?” I thought it was such an interesting way to ask a question, so specific. I was actually caught off guard and struggled to answer. So I turned the question back on her, her response “As long as I can remember.” I congratulated her on starting on the right path to success so early in her career. In truth, I was jealous, I had no idea this is where I’d be right now, and had I known that I wanted to be journalist (which I am not even sure if that is what I want to be) I would have been doing the exact same thing, trying to interview at the best place possible to get ahead of everyone else. This must be the reason that right now I feel so behind. With every new life path I choose to take, I always feel I am behind because everyone knew they wanted to do that job for their whole lives. I was raised based on the idea that you must work harder than everyone else to achieve success, so how can I even compete with people who have years of experience on me?  The answer is that I need to let go of the pressure I put on myself. I know there is no way to plan, life with play itself out the way its going to, and I really have no direct control over that. I need to see that the work I do now is not to compete but to grow. Even knowing these things, I can’t help but wish that I could go back just four years and choose differently, take different classes, do other internships, explore even more so I could be better prepared for now.

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Networking is like flirting

28 Mar

It’s Saturday night and a friend and I are having a casual dinner at a little resturant in Malibu. The waiter comes to ask for our order and I can’t help but notice how attractive he is. So I smile as I ask for water and give him my order, my very very subtle way of flirting. Flirting is something I feel I have never been good at. It takes just the right about of being coy and outgoing at the exact same time, a combination I have never seem to manage in the right amounts.

Then as dinner goes on, I hear a couple dissusing “their magazine”  in the booth next to us. I am delighted! What are the chances?! I whisper to my friend if I should introduce myself, try to network a little with clearly experienced people in the industry my heart is currently set on. Her response is “what do you have to lose?” Well my pride for one, what if they aren’t interested in talking, what if they are mean or rude? The same chances you take when you start the game of flirting with the opposite sex.

So I went for it, I took a chance put myself out there and introduced myself. We even swapped business cards! As I turned back around to face my friend, I was blushing, proud that I networked like a “real professional” and didn’t look too stupid.

I’ll be honest, I’ve never gotten a guy’s number before. I don’t know if its super common for women, but it’s never happened to me. So I have never had to make the dreaded first phone call, but when I network with that follow up call or email I get the excate same feelings as I would assume you get when making that first dating call. I debate incessantly about when to follow up. Is it too soon? Do I wait for the work week? What do I write? Should it be casual or formal? Do I just say hello or mention the prospect of a job?  Tons of options as to what to say and how to phrase things race through my head. My palms get sweaty, heat of embarrasment spreads up my neck and into my cheeks, my god you would think I was propsing marriage! But in the end I send the email and await the response.

I haven’t heard anything yet, but if I do I’ll let you know. Who knows maybe it will turn into a full blown relationship! Oh and as for the waiter, I debated about leaving my number on the receipt, but one adventure in the flirting world was enough for me for one night. Next time…